Know

What are Your Views about Families?

What comes to your mind when you hear the word family? Perhaps thoughts of individuals who have affected and shaped your life, or images of people coming together to celebrate holidays and other significant events; maybe smells of home-cooked food, memories of conversations or arguments you had with loved ones, feelings of love, joy, or sadness.

Families are central to individuals’ lives. Particularly when it comes to young children, families assume critical roles that significantly affect children’s well-being and development. As a professional working with young children, it is critical that you appreciate and understand children’s families. This lesson will familiarize you with current perspectives on how families are viewed and how they function. This information will provide helpful context for you to better understand your work and interactions with families.

The Meaning of Family

What does family mean to you? Who makes up your family? What kinds of things do you do together? What role do you play in your family?

Every family is different, and it is important to keep an open mind about what makes up a family. Each person defines family in their own way. For some, family may represent those individuals living in the same home (under one roof). For others, family may be parents and all of the important adults who help care for a young child, such as grandparents, aunts, uncles, neighbors, or best friends. Because family is a consistent part of most every child’s life, family is therefore one of the most important sources of information about each child in your care.

The U.S. Census Bureau defines family as a group of two or more people who are related by birth, marriage, or adoption, and who live together. The National Association for the Education of Young Children suggests that “the term family may include those adults, besides parents, with the responsibility of being involved in educating, nurturing, and advocating for the child.” Researchers studying and working with families define family as “two or more people who regard themselves as a family and who carry out the functions that families typically perform. These people may or may not be related by blood or marriage and may or may not usually live together” (Turnbull, Turnbull, Erwin, & Soodak, 2006, p. 7).

What are some things that stand out to you as you read these definitions? You may notice that the first definition is quite specific in terms of how relationships are described, whereas the other two definitions are broader. As a professional working with young children, it is important to acknowledge that your own experiences influence your views about families and working with families. You will encounter individuals who define family differently than you do and who may share values, customs, or codes of behavior that are different from yours.

Like individuals, families are varied. Family structures have become more diverse through shared custody, same-sex couple families, families where members have different immigration statuses, and when a parent has children with multiple partners. While these circumstances do not always bring challenges, research suggests that children whose family structures are complex may be more likely to experience negative consequences, such as less caregiving from a parent. Today, 40 percent of children are born to unmarried parents. Like the concept of ‘family,’ the concept of family well-being is also challenging to define. You may recognize family well-being when you see it in your program. Or you may recognize when families’ lack some aspect of family well-being. As you think about how best to engage with and support the families in your program, consider your role in strengthening families’ protective factors. The good news is that many of the behaviors that correspond to positive family functioning can be “taught and strengthened with education.” (National Academies of Sciences, Engineering, and Medicine, 2019, p. 42).

How are Families Viewed Today? Introducing Family-Centered Practice

Because families are central to their children’s development, they are partners, active participants, and decision-makers in their children’s education. As a result, a family-centered focus is considered one of the indicators of quality in early-childhood education, programs, and services. At the heart of family-centered practice is the belief that families are the most important decision-makers in a child’s life. Therefore, professionals must respect, support, and enhance the strengths and unique characteristics of each family (Sandall, Hemmeter, Smith, & McLean, 2005).

Family-centered practice also means that you understand the important effect all family members have on each other and on the child. Each family member affects the other and the ways that the family functions. All family members are interconnected. From our family, we learn skills that enable us to engage in school and the workplace.

When considering family-centered practice, you view children as part of a larger system; and you view family members as a whole. You become aware of and sensitive to the interactions and relationships that take place within the family, as well as outside interactions and supports that affect them. In an effort to maintain relationships and to work effectively together, you learn, respect and understand characteristics of each family and its support system. You can also consider the characteristics and stressors of families, which may affect their involvement in your family child care home. What affects one family member can affect all family members. A family is a system in which no one member is viewed in isolation.

Throughout the Virtual Laboratory School, we consider family-centered practice as an umbrella term that encompasses the beliefs and actions of the people in your program. Consider this table:

Making an effort to understand children and their families can create opportunities for you to better support the children in your care.

Honoring Diversity in Families

Culture and diversity affect all ages and stages of development—infancy, preschool, school-age, and beyond. It is important to recognize and incorporate a child’s culture into the learning environment. Culture refers to the shared experiences and history of different groups of people. Cultural differences may include differences in views of family and community, expectations of children, roles of parents, and value placed on education. Some very important learning occurs during the first years of life. For example, infants and toddlers learn new words, ways of interacting with others, how to communicate, and how to play. Preschoolers are learning how to interact with peers and adults, how to express their emotions, and how to express independence. During the school-age years, children learn a great deal about their backgrounds, heritage, and culture. Many of their behaviors are also influenced by culture: the age at which they can stay home alone, the nature of hanging out with friends, and their interactions with adults.

Culture is a significant factor in the ways families raise their children and how you, as a caregiver, provide care for each individual child. Examine your own cultural experiences and consider how these experiences affect your practice with children and families. Each individual brings specific values, beliefs, and assumptions about child rearing and development to their work. In almost every type of routine you perform, your values about it were shaped by your childhood and training.

Cultural Differences

As you work with children and families, it is important to recognize your values and beliefs and the ways in which they are communicated. For example, a parent might expect his child to use a pacifier at naptime, and you expect a child to stop using a pacifier during the toddler stage. Or a parent might expect a toddler to begin using a spoon and fork around age 3 when you might expect this behavior around 20 months.

Sometimes, you might feel unsure about how to care for a child or how to engage families who have very different experiences and cultures, including those who speak an unfamiliar language or who have unfamiliar religious customs. You can acknowledge differences and demonstrate an interest in the family in an effort to build relationships and learn ways to provide support for the children in your care. For example, you can learn how and when families share meals, which is influenced by culture and affects development.

When differences are viewed through the lens of culture, respectful conversations can lead to agreement in how these practices will be supported in your home.

Family child care and other learning settings provide an environment in which adults and children can learn about and honor differences in values, beliefs and perceptions. Learning one's culture occurs primarily within the family; however, in family child care, children also learn about culture and experience relationships that influence their sense of who they are and who they will become.

To help children develop, you must honor and celebrate the diversity of families. Diversity exists on a variety of dimensions:

• Composition (who is a member of the family)
• Race and ethnicity
• Language
• Socioeconomic status
• Sexual orientation
• Ability or special needs
• Educational background
• Values and traditions
• Child-rearing practices

Family Beliefs

Being a responsive family child care provider also means that you avoid making assumptions about different groups of people and the ways they act or think. As much as it is important to acknowledge differences between various groups of people, it is also important to recognize differences within groups. While there may be commonly shared characteristics, values, and attributes among people who come from a particular geographic region or cultural heritage, there is still considerable variability within the same group in terms of values or ways of doing things.

Also remember that families will differ in the way they approach parenting. Families may use parenting styles with which you aren’t familiar or you do not agree. Unless you feel that abuse or neglect is occurring, it is important to support each family in your care. If you are working with a family that uses a parenting style you are unfamiliar with, try to learn the characteristics of the style. Understanding how a child is cared for at home will help you to understand the child’s personality and behavior in your home. 

Working with families whose values and beliefs are different from your own may, at times, make you feel uneasy or uncomfortable. Embracing diversity in your work with children and families does not happen overnight. On the contrary, it can be a long and often messy process in which people from various backgrounds are challenged to face and understand different points of view, accept unfamiliar ways of doing things, and ultimately work together toward a common goal. It is important to understand that this is a two-way process. In the same way you may occasionally feel challenged or confused, families may feel the same. Researchers in the field of family and diversity remind us, “the challenge is not so much for providers to give up their own beliefs as to cultivate a habit of learning to understand and respect those of others” (Harry, Rueda & Kalyanpur, 1999).

School-age

School-age children offer a unique perspective on their cultural heritage because they are old enough to understand the differences between cultures. As a family child care provider, you can use this to your advantage by allowing older children to teach you and their peers about their family traditions and culture. Remember, though, that being a family child care provider means being sensitive to children’s preferences and needs. It is not uncommon for school-age children to want to fit in with their peers and minimize differences. School-age children might be embarrassed to share traditions or practices that make them different from peers. Respect the children’s preferences while continuing to encourage each child to explore and express their own culture.

See

Spend some time watching the video below and reflect on your families and the ways you honor and respect them. You can do this by listening to families’ experiences and concerns and by showing them that they are a valued and appreciated part of your family child care program.

In the next video you will hear from family child care providers as they describe how they work to honor the diversity of their families.

Do

There are many ways to show that you value the families of the children in your family child care home. Consider the following guidelines that reflect family-centered practice (Johnson, 1990; Turnbull, Turbiville, & Turnbull, 2000). Then think about how you can use these guidelines in your work with children and families.

• Recognize the family as the constant in the child’s life and that caregivers and service systems may come and go.
• Facilitate collaboration between families and yourself as a child care professional.
• Encourage family-to-family support and networking.
• Honor and respect family diversity in all dimensions (cultural, racial, ethnic, linguistic, spiritual, socioeconomic, or in terms of family members’ sexual orientation). To do this:
  • Ask families about their home language and if they would share key phrases they use at home.
  • Provide children’s books in the language each child in your care hears at home. Also try to provide information about your program, and/or pamphlets about parenting in the same language.
  • Invite the family to visit your program to sing songs, tell stories, and show books or pictures that demonstrate their culture, and introduce culturally specific foods.
  • Observe how a family interacts with their child.
  • Ask families to create a family or neighborhood storybook.
  • Meet regularly with families to learn about their hopes, dreams and goals for their child.

Completing this Course

For more information on what to expect in this course, the Family Engagement Competency Reflection, and a list of the accompanying Learn, Explore and Apply resources and activities offered throughout the lessons, visit the Family Child Care Family Engagement Course Guide. 

Please note the References & Resources section at the end of each lesson outlines reference sources and resources to find additional information on the topics covered. As you complete lessons, you are not expected to review all the online references available. However, you are welcome to explore the resources further if you have interest, or at the request of your trainer, coach, or administrator.